citrusjava: (Default)
[ableism, classicism, academia, mention of sevese sexual assault ] )


It turns out my pretty little accessible(ish) conference - wasn't - and at this point I honesty need a reality check.
I'd appreciate your input, especially if these topics are part of your lives.

Before the lest panel, a women approached one of the organizers and told her she can't understand a thing because of the academic language. The organizer, who happened to be presenting her paper next, told her she'd make an effort to speak more clearly. (seems like shedid)

But then the person closing the conference - for reasons no one seems to understand - went off topic three times to address this (or was it a coincidence....??) - In her discussion of academia being hegemonic and classicist, she stopped three times to say that it's ok if people don't understand what you say in an academic convention because that's the way academia works, to condescendingly explain to the audience how to look things up if they do not understand, and to directly say accessibility is not that important.

The person from the audience approached her, later, and they got into an argument. The other organizer, the one who changed her presentation earlier, tried to mediate, and got.... ironic!organizer to apologize, (so sincerely she spent a lot of the ride home lecturing people about how right she was). The person from the audience told her she didn't owe her to accept her apology, and left, hurt and angry.




And additionally, it turned out

she is living at a temporary hostel for victims of human trafficking/continuous sexual assault/idk, and one of the advisors (?) there did or did not suggest our conference as a nice good experience. (the advisor said she didn't idk0)







For me - the only way that makes sense to deal with this (since I only found out about it too late) - is - find this woman, apologize yes-sincerely and validate that this was not ok - and try to find out whether there is anything we could do to make it less icky

Some suggestions from talking with some of the organizers - we could meet and talk about it; if the topic of the conference interests her, she is welcome to join our research group (that would be such a delight for her with the person who treated her badly there,right); if she's still interested in the papers presented at the conference, some of us could give them again, better, at the hostel or for her and some of her friends (surely her dearest desire is to listen to MORE from us all); she could come give us a lecture ( for whatever woefully low fee we collect between us, or whatever I'll pay her fight me).


idk

talked with some of the organizers - not even Ironic!one, and every one of them's been telling me I'm overreacting, this isn't ableist or classicist and isn't a microaggression, every convention involves someone getting upseet -
and of course - that woman
was ANGRY and RUDE and we can't condone that by apologizing.

I feel so disheartened and confused, like I should be embarrassed for believing this should be fixed and thoroughly, rather than for the things done
citrusjava: (Default)
Sweeties, I'm also thinking a lot about Jared (and loving him a lot)
I feel maybe fandom needs a bit of comfort right now, too

Remember - Jared was really brave, and reached out. He half-did it a few days ago, asking anyone on Facebook at that moment to write to him about good things that SPN brought to their lives, and then he did it seriously and directly. That is so brave and trusting, especially involving fandom like this. This is already a very good thing to do to keep safe and get better, finding people who love him and asking for their support. And what's better - he has people, so many people who love him. He has Gen with him, Danneel is helping with the kids, Jensen keeps calling him, and probably others, too. He gets several messages a minute of love and support from fandom, and he said many times in the past that those mean so much for him.

He is clearly going through something rough. I don't know what exactly, but I suppose the season they shot, and the thing that happened to his friend a few months back, are not helpful. I'm guessing he's been holding it
together through finishing shooting. Regardless, it's rough.

But it will get better. And he knows it will get better, and he know that even if it doesn't feel that way at the moment. He knows it isn't his fault and he knows we don't blame him for it, either (or he does if he read anything - which I am certain he has). He knows he is very loved. That won't solve everything, but it helps. Not being isolated, knowing you are loved and having people around you for support, people who take it seriously and also don't blame you or panic, is so important. I wish the support system he has (and should have!) on anyone with MI.



Thanks to his campaign he knows he has a whole lot of support, and he knows more about depression, knows what to expect, knows it will get better. And Gen probably knows that too, he mentioned she was very involved in the campaign.



You guys, I know that the messages and support are meaningful and helpful for him. They are comforting and distracting. He took time off. He is surrounded with people who love him annd who know he needs help. He is taking care of himself like he's been telling all of us to do, and he is also being taken care of by loved ones.


Sweeties, I'm sure he really is moved by everyone's support and that it truly helps. It will get better.
citrusjava: (Default)
There's a thing I'm curious about. And since my deadline was today and I'm still not finished writing, I'm taking the time to wonder, and ask what you think.

While the word "gay" becoming a commonly used derogatory term, with all the hype about that, I hear more and more ability-related words being used as positive - crazy, sick, insane, even "I can't!" and its many variations have to do with it. Some aren't that new, but they're around a lot.



Personally I don't mind it, very fond of some of those, really (except for when it's triggery, which does sometimes happen) - but I do wonder what it means. Is this the stage before the backlash, in which an issue is becoming more socially accepted? I don't feel we're nearly there yet... definitely not enough for such a widely spread use of the words. Is it just people flipping meanings, like happens for some reason a lot? DK.

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